The Vig Chron

If I have offended you, you're quite welcome.

1/23/2005

The Deadline Draws Near...

Well, it's January 23rd and that gives me about a week until the application deadline for VCU. Nervous? Yes.
The last thing on the list is my letter of recommendation, which my artsy fartsy bro Allen is going to help me with.
I consider him to fall under the 'employer' catagory since he is my boss in a manner of speaking. Not that I have much of a choice because I don't have a teacher or counselor. He knows about art, he's a painter, I think he can handle it. Once I've got that, it's all going in the mail. Certified of course.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed and hoping the competition is slight.
*twidles thumbs*

April seems a long time away now.


1/17/2005

Metal 05: Show #1



What's better than seeing four metal bands for five bucks with your five buddies?

Me, Mike, Megan, Shawn, Jessi and Brett saw the show Saturday. It was a pretty good crowd at about 200 people, I'd estimate, which is pretty full for Alley Katz since the top floor was closed off to the bands and crews. All the bands were good, Sicks Deep was great, and St. Diablo just rocked that place. I loved the reggae infused metal vibe. Just goes to show, even metalheads can groove.

After the show, we hit TGI Fridays for dinner. Dinner sucked. The waiter was slow. I was too hyper to eat anyway. I had at least four Red Bulls and a Sparks alcoholic energy drink, too. What really sucked was that I had all this energy hit around 10 and I figured we'd go to a club in Choco Bottom since it was still early, but everyone was tired and hungry, so I didn't mention going. I was pretty bummed out though. It's not every weekend that I get to hang out in Richmond. Hopefully that will change if I get to start VCU in the fall. I love hanging out with my friends, but it's hard to get everyone on the same energy vibe at the same time. So some of us were just chill and then some of us were out in the crowd. I'm looking forward to meeting some fellow party goers in Richmond and becoming a member of the scene downtown.

Change will hopefully prove to be exciting.

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1/04/2005

The Abyss of Opportunity

There comes a time when the long road you've followed for so long will fork...and you must choose a direction. And I don't believe there is anything more confusing that uncertainty.
My road is blurring and before me I see this one path dividing into several.

I have lived my entire life in this town. All (nearly) twenty three years of it, I have been here.
I was born here, I graduated here, I was married here...but I don't want to stay here. As much as I complain, Lynchburg is really a good place to live for the most part, but I'm ready and willing to move on. Though I am young, I see myself becoming stuck here and never leaving. This would be a nightmare to me. I cannot look back at my life when I am old and regret having been a rock in the river.

It is both a blessing and a curse to have the potential to do many things.

RMWC offers an exceptional writing cirriculum with creative writing, poetry, and non-fiction.
They are located here in Lynchburg, but the drawback is the price tag. This is a private college, so I would need an immense amount of financial aid, grants, and scholarships. We're talking about $800 per credit hour! The classes are small and you get much more attention from the professors. This would be the safe choice. There would be no relocation, perhaps just a cut back in work hours.
But, if a writer is the way to go, there is no better place on the East Coast.

On the other hand, VCU School of the Arts offers the best art programs in the country. It is one of the top six art schools in the US and it's only three hours away in Richmond. This is one of the only schools in the US to offer a BA in Fashion Design and Merchandising. It has been my dream to be involved in the fashion industry. I believe I have the talent and originality to be successful in this field. It is a great deal cheaper, about 5K per year; however, I would have to move closer to Richmond. I'd have to change my whole life around. New job, new house, new city.
But, if a dream is to become a reality, you have to wake up.

The thought of going back to school has been difficult and you cannot imagine how many sleepless nights and daydreaming hours I have spent thinking about it. The questions I've asked myself are endless. But the question that lingers on my mind the most?

Is it too late to go back?

I'm only 22, but I'm married, I have a full-time job which I've had for almost three years, I have been in this apartment for four years, all my friends and family are here...could I really just up and change my world?

My mind is at war. My logical brain fears change and uncertainty. It thinks only of the practical. Where will you work? How much does it cost to live there? What about your friends here? Where will you live? How will you get around with one car? My creative brain is excited and curious and unbearably loud. Do it! Move! Follow your dreams! Meet new people! Get out of this town and live a little! Grow up and do something with your life! What are you waiting for?

Jesus. What am I going to do? I can't give up on this idea. One way or another, I have to go to school. Finally I've realized that going to college is not about getting a degree so you can have the highest paying job. It's not about making everyone else happy by having a 'safe job' and being something practical. College is not about going because you're supposed to. College is about expanding your humanity, knowledge, and abilities.

I used to think people that graduated and aren't doing anything with their degrees wasted their time and money, but that's wrong. They have something I don't. They have that knowledge. They put their hearts and time and drive into something, stuck with it, and they have something to show for it. Monetary reward is wonderful, but it's not enough.

I want to do something with my strengths. I can write, I can create. I am original and I am fearless. I have been blessed with passion and talent and I will not waste it.

I now know that I am ready to be somebody.